August Monthly Report

Agent: Trouble

I have been working on a project to tunnel out of this prison. I pretend that I am hiding from the others in the closet, but I am actually trying to break out of this prison by digging a hole in the flooring under the closet. I am out of sight of the jailers and they sometimes call me. I must go slowly because I do not wish my activity to be exposed. I show myself on occasion and allow the female jailer to take me to the front of the prison. I use this time to rest up from my exertions. The flooring is quite thick and I can’t get purchase with my claws. I will persevere and escape, somehow.

Agent: Pica

I wish to lodge a complaint against Special Agent Princess. He has begun to spend a lot of time hanging around my station. I’ll make no bones about it. He bothers me. I believe he does it on purpose, and he may think it is part of his job, but I was not the one accused neither of cowardice nor of complicity with our jailors. I resent his continued harassment. I demand that HQ reprimand him, at the very least. I also would like to point out that Agent Trouble, while not a great friend of mine; she is a colleague and deserving of respect. Both Agent Storm and Special Agent Princes seemed to have taken great pleasure in victimizing her. I wish to go on record in her support with regard to whatever Special Agent Princess might had said about her in his report before he left.

Agent Luna

It was my understanding that Special Agent Princess was here to investigate my charges against Agent Storm and his countercharges against me. I do not believe that he discharged his duties at all well. He palled around with Agent Storm, ganging up on Agent Trouble to the point that we only see her when the female jailor forces her into the front area of the prison. That she has been content with remaining at her post in the larger litter box room, is irrelevant. I must protest their behavior on her behalf. That Agents Storm and Princess should have forgotten themselves to such an extent is reprehensible. I do not feel that Agent Princess investigated the charges against Agent Storm correctly, nor do I feel his investigation sufficiently exonerated me of the charges against me. I demand a copy of Special Agent Princess’s report as is my right in this case.

Agent Storm

It was my understanding that Agent Princess dropped all the charges against both Agent Luna and me. While I don’t necessarily agree with his conclusions with regard to Agent Luna, I am pleased to be exonerated of the charge of cowardice. I further understand that there are those who believe that Agent Princess and I targeted Agent Trouble for harassment. I hasten to assure Command that nothing could be further from the truth. We were only trying to ascertain that she was all right. We had seen very little of her for several days. It is distressing to learn that our concern was so badly misconstrued. I shall miss Special Agent Princess.

Special Agent Princess, FCIS

I have determined that no one here has committed any serious infractions of Feline Law. It is my recommendation that all charges of cowardice and collusion be dropped due to lack of evidence. Therefore, I am respectfully requesting details on my scheduled move to my new posting. In the meantime, I will continue to monitor Agent Trouble closely as I believe that she has developed her own agenda with regard to escaping from this prison. I shall be looking for my orders within a few weeks and hope that I will be well into my new assignment before the weather turns cold.